“We will all lose someone we love at some point in life, and feeling grief and being vulnerable about it is not a sign of weakness. It is a pure reflection of the love and connection you have had the privilege of experiencing.”

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) describes grief as the emotional reaction to losing someone close.

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Building on this, Dr. Simran Malhotra, an expert in palliative care, hospice, and lifestyle medicine, defines grief as a completely normal response to any kind of loss (a job, a relationship, a body part, or a life). 

She adds that grief comes in two main forms: anticipatory and bereavement. Anticipatory grief occurs before a loss, often in families facing serious illness, and may involve sadness, farewells, or preparing for the future. Meanwhile, bereavement follows the death of a loved one and can include sadness, denial, or a sense of lost identity.

Grief and Mental Health 

Children and teens may show grief in ways adults may not notice, such as acting out, feeling emotions they can’t name, or struggling in school. The majority of adults adapt with time, but if someone is really feeling stuck, it’s usually a sign that they need further care and support.

The expert noted, “Complicated or prolonged grief affects about 10% of adults worldwide and can significantly disrupt relationships, daily functioning, and overall quality of life. Several factors may put a person at higher risk of complicated or prolonged grief disorder (PGD), including the way the loss occurred, the type and duration of the relationship with the deceased, etc.

 During the pandemic, I saw many people face the sudden loss of loved ones without the chance to say goodbye in person due to strict no-visitor policies. That absence of closure in combination with the sudden loss definitely created conditions that increased risk for complicated or prolonged grief for many people in 2020,” she said.

No one deserves to face grief alone. If you are grieving, know that you are not alone. Reach out, lean on others, and allow yourself to be supported by others.

What to Understand

“There is no real ‘timeline’ for grief as each person’s experience is unique.” The pain doesn’t disappear over time; it simply changes. It comes in waves; some unexpected triggers can be a phone call asking for them, seeing their photo online, or realizing you’re alone doing a simple task like laundry.

Showing Support

After the loss of a loved one, strong support from family, friends, and community mayreducepsychological distress, promote healthier coping, and foster resilience.

While supporting those grieving, remember that no words can erase their pain. Phrases like “let it go,” “you’ll be fine,” or “don’t worry” can unintentionally minimize their pain, said Dr. Simran.

A quiet presence speaks louder—instead of trying to “fix” their grief or pain, focus on being present. If you really need to do something, think of small, meaningful ways you can help —for example, organize a meal train, help with home/pet/childcare, send a care package, or write a simple note letting them know you are thinking about them.

If grief persists or gets worse, gently suggest reaching out to their medical team to connect them with resources like bereavement counselors, mental health therapists, social workers, chaplains, or support groups. Additionally, cultural and religious beliefs play a significant role in shaping how grief is expressed and understood. These practices and beliefs may reduce theriskof complicated or prolonged grief.

Your grief is part of your uniquely beautiful human story. Let yourself to love, feel and keep growing as you simultaneously learn to carry the memory of someone who remains a part of you.

Julia Boms is a public health researcher and writer with a focus on maternal, child and adolescent health, and behavioral health. As a health equity advocate, she is passionate about improving health outcomes for underserved populations.